Three online dilemma’s...What is the etiquette here?
I have three things presently bothering me online. I am presenting them to you guys to see if you have a solution for me.
1. There is a girl who lately has been making strides to be my friend. I know this girl through my boyfriend and I just don't know if she is genuine. He tells me that she used to call him weekly and once held a considerable crush on him. She also is on again off again bff's with his ex-fiance. It seems as though every time they are off again she pops up and wants to hang out. Do I trust this? My bf has told me that she has told him to leave me before because I was no good for him and only upset him. But of course we all know Eric isn't known for his trust worthy-ness. This particular girl has always been very nice to me in person and seems to be genuine but you never know if you should trust a woman or not. I don't want to get all buddy buddy with someone and let them into my life only to have them sell trade secrets to the enemy or use me to get to my boyfriend. (truth be told I might not mind the latter.) She has asked me to work out with her, like at the walking park and have lunch with her. Should I?
2. My second dilemma really is just more of a gripe. There is a girl who is on my page that constantly puts down or belittles anything that I like. But she continually makes attempts and hanging out with me or friendship. I don't understand why this girl would want to be my friend if she finds everything about me to suck. I don't know why I haven't deleted her. I think I just enjoy the abuse.
3. My third situation is something of a touchy nature. I have a tendency to get bored and want to mess with people and this is a bit tempting but I know it might hurt some people as well. Awhile ago this random guy sent me a message asking to be friends. I looked at his page and he seemed relatively harmless. He has a girlfriend and seems to like the same things I do. Other than being overly athletic and adventurous, I think we could be friends. I've always had guy friends so it's not really a big deal. He lives in W-S too so I thought we could be friends. We exchanged a few emails and after I gave him my standard speech about not knowing anything about W-S and looking for places to hang out, he stopped responding. I figured I probably scared the dude with my overwhelming neediness and he just decided to stay away from me. No biggy, I'm used to it.
So yesterday I got a message from him asking if I was looking for "some fun on the side". What the? So I sent him something back asking him which side because I just couldn't pass up the opportunity to be hilarious. But then I starting looking at his page and his gf's page and saw a blog she had posted. It talked about how he had just had a 'heart procedure' and that she didn't realize how much she could care about someone and how in love with him she is. She said, and I quote "Until now, I didn't know that it was possible to care this much about someone. If anything were to ever happen to him, I would be completely helpless and lost. I am completely, hopelessly devoted, and in love with this man. I can't imagine my life without him and I don't know where I would go, what I would do, or who I would turn to". So do I tell her about what he said only one day after her having posted this? I would want to know if the man I'm 'hopelessly devoted' to were looking for some 'fun on the side'. Plus homeboy has no idea that I'm not really as attractive as my myspace would suggest. But that is beside the point. I know by forwarding this message to the girl it would only cause problems for them and he would spin something to make it seem like I had doctored things, but this girl is only being set up for disaster down the road. This dude obviously has no intention of being faithful to this girl and I think she should know before she seriously gets hurt. What do ya'll think?
3 comments:
1) the chick who is trying to be your friend...if you want someone to walk with you, i'd do it. if she has some other motive, hopefully, you will sense this and you can shut the friendship down. if you don't need another friend, just ignore her. no harm done because you are not obligated to be her friend.\
2)chick. why are putting up with an abusive friend? i think i have had my share of abusive friends, maybe it is a learning process about what true friends are.
3) if you were in her place what would you want the other person to do? would you want to know or would you want to keep the illusion of a great boyfriend? maybe this guy is capable of being a great boyfriend and "getting some on the side"? some people have lots of energy to juggle multiple relationships.
Happy Christmas!
hey Jade. I know you made this post a long time ago but I thought I'd reply anyway!
1. trust your gut feeling. From what I hear it's saying to forget about a meaningful friendship with this girl.
2. sounds like she thinks you are super cool but has a low self esteem, so although she idolizes you she cant help but to put you down to make herself feel better. Some people are like that. I don't mind as long as I keep it in the back of my head that what they are saying might not be what they really feel.
3. what a creep. you could go either way on this one, but my personal opinion is to say don't bother. he might never follow through on that sort of thing, and for all we know just saying that to you scared him and he felt guilty and is now the best bf ever with no harm done. or he's a freaking creep.
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